Monday's Rag Letter of the Day

[ant london]

just read this on football365.com......made me laugh

Dear Football365

As has been well-documented so far this season, United have problems and everyone has been talking about these problems without offering valid solutions. As such I have submitted my core ideas you should be addressing as below:

Solution 1) 2-2 wins three points. This is something we should be talking to the FA about, as we seem to be attaining this scoreline every week I firmly believe that, in the event of a 2-2 draw, the points should go to Manchester United, as we will almost certainly deserve them anyway. This rule should also apply to matches not featuring Manchester United.

Solution 2) Make the refs biased again. I have noticed the worrying trend of referrees officiating United matches with increasing impartiality. I find myself harkening back to the good old days of phantom goals and dubious penalties. Have you clocked that there has been very little complaining about dodgy ref-work during United matches of late? An alarming trend.

Solution 3) Make everyone else a little bit worse. Whilst we have lost a bit of quality over the past couple of seasons, everyone else has got a little better and this just won't do. Spurs and Man City should get back to being basket-case chancers, as is their rightful place, and Chelsea should return to being good, but not good enough. Liverpool are fine as they are.

Solution 4) Sign famed mysoginist Andrey Arshavin and make him finance director. This would be the only way of ensuring that we'd get a straight summary of the state of our finances, and, as a bonus, he'd probably deliver it in a humorous way that will insult some people. Our team would also have the combined insanity of Arshavin and Patrice Evra, establishing United's place in 'Quotes of the Week' columns for years to come.

Job done, no need to thank me Fergie, just get honest Dave Gill to send me a cheque. Actually scratch that - it'd probably bounce.
Smyth, MUFC

[DoomMerchant]

when are you going to step up and admit that you and that potbellied freak of nature Phil Dowd were separated at birth? just saying like, etc

cheers

Here's a topical peek for the uninitiated...



also, there's this dead sexay glamour shot: