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If pies made points, who'd be top of the Premier League?

PostPosted: Wed Nov 11, 2009 4:09 pm
by patrickblue
Guess who?

More from our favourite paper

http://www.mirrorfootball.co.uk/opinion ... 18935.html

We're all familiar with the Michelin guide when it comes to eating out.

So I thought it might be pointless fun to compile the MirrorFootball guide for eating at football grounds.

My most unscientific of research is based on the northern clubs I frequent and I've listed them in no particular order with a fork rating out of five.

Bolton: On entering the Reebok, one's eyes are immediately drawn to a huge silver bowl and an equally-huge ladle.

This contains the finest onion gravy in the north of England and its union with a Greenhalgh's meat pie and chips is a marriage made in culinary heaven.
Fork rating 4

Wigan: One positively salivated at the prospect of dining at the DW, given Wigan's peerless reputation when it comes to pies.

But having carefully checked the foil colour coding to avoid the dreaded cheese and onion pie, I must confess to being slightly disappointed when I took my first bite.

Still, the abundance of biscuits at half-time left one feeling content before indigestion set in.
Fork rating 3

Blackburn: Chez Ewood is one of the most improved havens for hungry reporters in the north.

The signature dish is a divine Lancashire hotpot, so authentic that if one listens carefully one can hear it say 'By heck, ecky thump! Turned out nice again!'.
Fork rating 3

Manchester City: Think of Manchester and one immediately thinks of contemporary architecture and cutting-edge design. This is reflected in the recently refurbished facilities at City, where one's taste buds are positively indulged by a superb carvery.

One is left feeling that one is at one's favourite aunt's with the copious amount of treats on offer and the piece de la resistance is the bespoke half-time meat pie, brought to one's seat in the press box.
Fork rating 5

Manchester United: Gone are the days when one used to fight one's colleagues for a Mr Kipling's French Fancy and a curled-up cheese sandwich.

Chips are very much the centre-piece, and at Old Trafford they are served with everything. Sir Alex also serves up a classic red whine every time United lose.
Fork rating 3

Liverpool: Few eateries are steeped in as much history as Anfield and one is left in awe at the thought that this was once part of the hallowed boot room.

Seating is sparse, and contrary to the chants of visiting fans, Rafa Benitez does not moonlight there as a fat Spanish waiter.
Fork rating 3

Everton: After climbing up three flights of stairs to reach Goodison's intimate eaterie, diners are prepared to eat anything.

Like the manager, the food is plain, but good, and should one have a sweet tooth, yes, there are toffees.
Fork rating 3

Hull: One might have thought that fish would be the dish, given Humberside's strong links with the sea.

But last Sunday manager Phil Brown served up humble pie to all those who turned up expecting him to get the pork chop.
Fork rating 3

Re: If pies made points, who'd be top of the Premier League?

PostPosted: Wed Nov 11, 2009 4:14 pm
by Alex Sapphire
we've fookin won something!!
must say I'm liking the new peppered steak pies this season

Re: If pies made points, who'd be top of the Premier League?

PostPosted: Wed Nov 11, 2009 4:32 pm
by Mase
CHAMPIONS! CHAMPIONS! CHAMPIONS!

Re: If pies made points, who'd be top of the Premier League?

PostPosted: Wed Nov 11, 2009 4:54 pm
by Dingus McDouchey
City City the best pies in the land and all the world.

Re: If pies made points, who'd be top of the Premier League?

PostPosted: Wed Nov 11, 2009 5:07 pm
by crossan
Holland(s)...........

Re: If pies made points, who'd be top of the Premier League?

PostPosted: Wed Nov 11, 2009 5:15 pm
by mr_nool
What's wrong with cheese and onionpie,btw? I really like the one they have at Eastland.

Re: If pies made points, who'd be top of the Premier League?

PostPosted: Wed Nov 11, 2009 5:17 pm
by Alex Sapphire
"Cheese and Onion"..........................."Pie"?

Re: If pies made points, who'd be top of the Premier League?

PostPosted: Wed Nov 11, 2009 5:20 pm
by The Man In Blue
MaseCTID wrote:CHAMPieONS! CHAMPieONS! CHAMPieONS!

Re: If pies made points, who'd be top of the Premier League?

PostPosted: Thu Nov 12, 2009 5:24 am
by Twobob
our chicken balties are crap this season ;-)

Re: If pies made points, who'd be top of the Premier League?

PostPosted: Thu Nov 12, 2009 5:29 am
by Colin the King
In fairness our pies are fucking awful. I got a meat and potato once and it was frozen in the middle, second time a chicken balti and it was like dog food soup.

Hughes out.

Re: If pies made points, who'd be top of the Premier League?

PostPosted: Thu Nov 12, 2009 5:31 am
by Slim
Colin the King wrote:In fairness our pies are fucking awful. I got a meat and potato once and it was frozen in the middle, second time a chicken balti and it was like dog food soup.

Hughes out.


Shouldn't the CEO be to blame, after all he is the Cook.

ba dum tish.

Re: If pies made points, who'd be top of the Premier League?

PostPosted: Thu Nov 12, 2009 8:32 am
by ant london
Slim wrote:
Colin the King wrote:In fairness our pies are fucking awful. I got a meat and potato once and it was frozen in the middle, second time a chicken balti and it was like dog food soup.

Hughes out.


Shouldn't the CEO be to blame, after all he is the Cook.

ba dum tish.


Dog food soup already had me chuckling

But the cook gag made me dribble water down myself

Cheers lads

Re: If pies made points, who'd be top of the Premier League?

PostPosted: Thu Nov 12, 2009 9:01 am
by Twobob
Slim wrote:
Colin the King wrote:In fairness our pies are fucking awful. I got a meat and potato once and it was frozen in the middle, second time a chicken balti and it was like dog food soup.

Hughes out.


Shouldn't the CEO be to blame, after all he is the Cook.

ba dum tish.



That was fucking funny!

Hope you're here all week ;-)

Re: If pies made points, who'd be top of the Premier League?

PostPosted: Thu Nov 12, 2009 9:11 am
by lythamblue
Unfortunately guys, this bloke is a member of the press/media and is referring to the facilities available to him and not the general public, in the new Press Lounge facility that was opened just before the Arsenal match.

As I reported beforehand in a previous thread at the time, they are top notch and without a doubt the best in the Premiership.

However, our food that we have to pay for from the stadium kiosks is still overpriced, overcooked and very expensive.